On Oscar’s half birthday I was sitting with my Mom after dinner – watching Oscar play in the other room with my brother and sister. I watched him with his hilarious mannerism, having full out conversations. I turned to my Mom and said “I think it’s time that Oscar was no longer on my blog.” I’m not sure why I said it, but when the words came out I realized that I had been thinking it for awhile. My Mom kindly responded that she agreed, that maybe it was time for Oscar to just be, well, Oscar. It wasn’t a huge discussion and within a minute we were back to talking about other things. The drive home that night I wondered what had changed. Why had I felt comfortable for two and a half years of Oscar’s life to post pictures, and suddenly, almost overnight, I decided I wasn’t?
Although we live in a world where sharing a lot online is becoming normal, I’m relatively uncomfortable with sharing online. (Which is funny, seeing as I write a blog) But I’m not as comfortable elsewhere as I am here – Facebook I limit my friends, and am on the verge of deleting my account. Instagram I have one follower (my account is set to private). As news broke last night about Instagram changing their user policy I’m in the process of deleting Instagram as well. I’ll never use FourSquare and I freak out when an App wants to know my location. Perhaps it’s because I’ve grown up without the Internet, and then watched it evolve that I’m still relatively uncertain about it all.
I appreciate I am likely in the minority – We’re in a a world where online sharing is increasingly normal. But I do wonder if we’re all just insta-sharing without thinking about long term effects. Which led me to wonder about Oscar, and his place on my blog.
Although I don’t write stories or post pictures that I feel would embarrass Oscar in any way – I can’t predict the future as to how he will feel. How would he feel if his childhood was public? The simple answer is, I don’t know. So with my trepidation about sharing online mixed with ongoing concerns I have with online privacy and how images are used, I felt that it was time to just draw Oscar’s time on my blog to a close. It’s also because sharing photos and stories of Oscar is so ridiculously easy – that I’m mindful that I don’t fall into a trap of it being my “go to” post when perhaps, nothing else is going on.
I’m not cutting Oscar out of my blog – I am going to try to be more respectful of him from now on. You may see his sweet feet, or the back of his head. Or, I may post his photo later on, but right now I think I need to just take a break. I’ll still talk about Oscar, and talk about projects we do. But I have to figure out a way to do it in a way that fits now with my new comfort level.
Ps., I’m a little sad that the sharing of his photos has come to an end because I love, love posting his pictures. I’m a proud Mommy. 🙁
ps., I feel it also necessary to really stress that my decision to do so, is in no way a reflection of how I feel when I see others post their kids on their blogs. I feel as though each person has different comfort zones and we should each respect that. Should you feel comfortable posting pictures, then that is totally fine with me. My comfort zone shifted, rather quickly – from being ok with posting his pictures to almost immediately feeling as though I couldn’t do it anymore..